Some Father's Day Love to an Awesome Dad!

Happy day to celebrate Fathers! Here is a very long post celebrating the awesome person that is my dad.  

When I was younger I gave my dad this little book. It is called "Father to Daughter: Life Lessons on Raising a Girl. It is filled with lessons a Dad needed to know about raising his daughter. It is broken into sections by age or life event and some of them are pretty funny. My favorite ones are: 

1. Remember, when you're dealing with a 13-year-old girl, for all intents and purposes you're dealing with a fruit cake. 

2. There will be days when you think you've raised an alien. Those are the same days she feels she's being raised by one.

3. You have no power over how much makeup, shampoo, mascara, eyeliner, perfume, cologne, body wash, and bath lotion she will by. Accept this and move on.

4. Odd-looking boys will start showing up at your house. This is to be expected because adolescent boys are odd-looking 

5. She'll say you're always lecturing her; you'll say she never listens. You will both be right.

I'm certain that my dad learned all of these lessons having to deal with me growing up, except maybe number 3. He still hasn't accepted the limited number of hygiene products I do buy. On the other hand I think he's crazy for the amount of Santa Clauses and tractors that he continues to buy. Of course, I have learned many, many invaluable lessons from him. 

My dad is one of the coolest people you will ever meet, at least I think he is. He made me do a lot of things growing up – go to church, do my homework, mow the yard, visit my grandparents regularly; all things that I hated doing at the time. But lately I have started to realize that I have learned the most from my dad. Some things he taught me directly, like how to drive a tractor and how to change a tire. But most of the things I learned from him were by watching the way he acted, things that I picked up over time. I don’t always use everything he taught me perfectly but indirectly my dad has showed me how to be a respected, confident, and hard working member of society. He has taught me how to treat people, how to get where you want to go, and how to live a life to love. So why not compile them all into a list for everyone to read? I did just that.

Here are 22 things that I learned from my dad:

1. Eat locally – Whenever we went on vacation we would always go some place local. Places run by the locals that you wouldn’t be able to get anywhere else. It was a great way to meet people and to learn the culture of the area you are visiting.  My dad would always tell a story about when we were in Colorado and he asked someone at our hotel for a recommendation of where to eat. She kept naming off chain restaurants, like Chili’s or Wendy’s. You can get that at home, why would you want to eat that now! You also never know when you are going to come across the best burger you have ever eaten, or someone special recipe for ribs.

2. How to spread mulch correctly – 1 inch all the way around to lock in moisture. Make sure to get it all the way up to the base of the plants.

3. Always tip and tip well – The people helping you, no matter if it’s a waitress or the guy helping you check your luggage at the airport, are there to make a living. They are also there to help you. If you get good service, tip generously, you would want people to do the same to you. Treat people with kindness and you will get kindness back.

4. Communicate: Respond to emails even if it is brief.  – I am terrible at doing this but I am getting better. Communication is definitely the key to success, I have learned that that is true about everything in life. 

5. Connect with people: Learn about them so you have something to talk about later.– When ever we go somewhere my dad is always the one asking questions. Where are you from, what is it like therr, what do you do, what did you do before this? I always thought it was so strange that he did this but now I understand why. He was showing interest, and as a result extending kindness. He was making a connection. If you make a connection with a person, then they will want to help you and will treat them well in return. Not only that but it will make your experience better because you met someone interesting. I haven’t mastered this skill yet at all.

6. Learn to say no- My dad was terrible at saying no for a while growing up. Not to me, he was good at saying no to me. But he volunteered for everything. He was so busy. But when you have too much on your plate then you are not giving 100% of yourself to the things you are doing. You can only stretch yourself so thin before things start to slip. He got better at saying no as I got older and focused on only a few passions. By doing that he was able to make the things he was involved in amazing. You can’t do everything and it is ok to say no.

7. How to drive a tractor – Not many people say they have this skill. It is something that I am immensely proud of. How many people can say they can drive a tractor?! If you ever visit me in Connecticut I will make you drive a tractor, there is no way around it. Now you would think that if I could drive a tractor then I can drive stick… that is barely true. Although he did teach me the basics.

8. How to take care of a yard – My one and only job growing up was mowing our yard. We lived on 4 acres and probably 3 of them were all grass, at least it felt like it. It took me at least 2 hours to do the whole thing. It was a love/hate relationship. But I now know how to do it correctly! You cut in the edges, then in small areas you can just go in a circle, driving with the front right wheel inside the area you already did so that you know it overlaps. In the big, open section at the back he always wanted me to do perfect lines. But I liked to start in the middle and go in a circle, that was a lot more fun. He would yell at me and I would tell him that if he wanted it does his way then he should do it. That tactic never worked.

The other thing I learned to do when caring for a yard, is pick up sticks. I thought picking up sticks was the stupidest thing ever when I was younger and I would make any excuse to escape inside. But I can kind of see the value in it now. Sticks do look horrible on your yard and if you don’t get rid of them the trees will just shed more.

9. There is never a bad time to stop for ice cream – This is one of those things that makes my dad super awesome. Ice cream makes everything better and there were many times when we would be out and about doing errands and he would randomly decide that we needed to stop and get ice cream. I think this is where my love of spontaneity comes from. Why not get ice cream? That’s awesome.

10. Learn people’s names and use them – This goes back to asking people questions. Making an effort to learn someone’s name and then using it makes them feel like you care about them. It helps you make a connection and that person will remember you because of it.

11. Be one step ahead: Not just prepared – When I was in school my dad always wanted me to go above and beyond. I thought this was so stupid. You aren’t going to be graded on the extra effort, why do it? I now understand this a little better. In the context of a job, going above and beyond means being one step ahead of your employer. When your boss asks you to do a job, you do what they ask as well as the next two steps after it. That way people see you are driven and are serious about what you are doing. This can continue further to doing something before you are asked, or doing more then you are asked. Always be one step ahead. It helps with negotiating too.

12. Create the idea first: Then worry about the budget – When brainstorming ideas for anything he would always tell me to dream big, to not worry about how much something would cost because thinking about that can hinder the creative flow. You can always take an idea an tweak it to a budget. It’s best to get the ideas out there and then worry about the restrictions.

13. Don’t be afraid to ask for something you want – The worst they can say is no right? I am pretty good at this; I have a lot of confidence. I don’t mind walking up to people and asking them for what I want. How else are you going to get what you want? I learned this from my dad through observation, he was never afraid to go to the front desk of our hotel or to someone in charge and ask for something. And he was never phased by the answer, even if it was no.

14. Network – get your name out there and into their heads – This seems obvious; it gets drilled in your head all throughout your academic career. But, my dad taught me the importance of it. Just like learning peoples names and connecting with people, networking means people remember you. When people remember you and remember your effort and how you treated them they will be more willing to do things for you. That is a huge and important part of being successful, networking. Eventually, you want people to come asking for you, instead of you asking for them.

15. How to care for a car – How to change a tire: I have already used this skill a few times. It came in handy when my tire blew at 1 in the morning on my way home from work and I was all alone. Thanks dad.

How to check your oil: And know when to have it changed. I now feel like this is an obvious thing to know and am surprised when people don’t know how to do it. Basic car maintenance, it’s important.

Speaking of basic car maintenance I now know when they are trying to screw me over at the dealer. I know what my car needs, my air filters do not need to be changed, thank you. Confidence is key.

How to wash car: This sounds simple but I got yelled at a lot because it would be streaky when I was done. Start from the top, use long stroke, re-dip the sponge often. It can make a difference.

16. How to back up a truck and trailer – I like to brag about this one. My reversing skills are quite awesome, although the rearview camera on my car is not helping me maintain this one at all. Through this and the car stuff it is fun to one up guys when they can’t do something. Teaching a guy how to change a tire, or backing up a truck for them is certainly a confidence booster.

17. Always thoroughly research big ticket items – Like a car, or a T.V. Know the options and the variety of what’s out there. Read the bad reviews, they will show you the truth. Don’t settle. Make sure you get what you want and something that works for you. There is always exactly the product you want, at the price you want out there. And if there is not, maybe it’s not the right time to buy it.

18. Managing your finances – I’m in college, I don’t have a lot of money. But I do know what to do with the money I do have and I know the importance of saving your money for the future. Whether that be a house or retirement. My dad, actually my parents, have taught me things like paying yourself. If you want to by a car in the near future, pay yourself first. Save up the money so that when you buy the car you can put down a large down payment and won’t end up with a huge loan. Instead of making loan payments after buying the car, make payments to yourself ahead of time.

19. Have a career: not a job –There is a huge difference between a job and a career and its growth. You should always want to grow where you are. There should always be a way for you to move up. Like I said earlier, you eventually want people to be coming for you, instead of you going after the job.

20. If something was awesome, never try to repeat it – I kind of learned this myself. Example: My 16^th birthday party was amazing. We tried to do the same concept and theme for my 17^th birthday party and it wasn’t nearly as good. Example 2: My sophomore year in college we lived in Brevard. The next year my roommates went to the exact same room and it wasn’t the same. There were a bunch of others things that factored into that one and there are some exceptions but the theory stands. If you try to do something the same exact way twice, it will never be as good. Make some changes, let it grow, and try something new. That way people won’t get bored with it and it wont feel like the same thing.

21. How to make a nice meal – My dad knows how to make something special in very simple ways. Whether we were having company over or it was just a really nice summer evening he is good at throwing together a really nice meal. Add some nice bread, put together a simple appetizer place, and pour some nice drinks. Make the potato’s scalloped instead of mashed. Little things like this can take a meal from everyday to special. 

22. Always keep a box of brownie mix on hand – You never know when you are going to need to bring treats to a meeting, or someone is having a bad day. Then you can whip up some brownies and you’ll make someone’s day or be seen as the person who brought brownies to the meeting. I guess this can go with be one step ahead. I always keep a box of brownies or cookies on hand.

My dad has taught me many more things then this but I think this list is everything that is the most important to me. Thank you dad, for everything you have taught me and for being the person that you are. You are caring, compassionate, and brave. Without you in my life I would not be the person that I am. You are amazing and I love you so very much. I can't wait for the things that I will learn from you in the years to come. Happy Father's Day.